Front Magazine

Dunmow launch another attack

Now here's a salutary tale...

Front Magazine - they of BBC2 fame (Between The Covers) - saw a way of having a bit of fun at the expense of your mates at Dunmow.

They decided, having taken on the might of the Page 3 5-a-side team a couple of months earlier (and who could blame them), that they would have a nice easy run-out against a bunch of no hopers like us.

We arrived to mark out the lines on the pitch and put the goals up (no sweaters for these boys) and waited for the arrival of Front. In the meantime we discovered that certain people couldn't get out of bed on a cold, wet Sunday morning, not for no one - so we were down to 10 men!

Well, an hour late, and after much frantic phoning around Front arrived - seems their mini-bus didn't arrive. Having seen their Editors forms of transport (dodgy BMW from erstwhile villain Dave Courtney) it's not a great surprise!

Half time beer break!

Front Magazine turned out in brand new, beautifully pressed Leeds United 1972 Replica Shirts, much to the writers disappointment, being a Leeds fan and knowing we were going to give them a fine hiding! It was agreed that 30 minutes each way would be more than enough. Well, the pubs were open!

The game kicked off and after 5 minutes Dunmow were down to 9 men. Killer Midfielder Rob having gone down with a nasty strain to the groin. He was dispatched to stand "somewhere up front" where he dispatched 2 fine goals. Had we found the answers to our striking problems? (No, had we hell! Ed)

Anyhow, to cut a long story short, we pasted them 10-4 and trundled off to the pub happy in the knowledge that we had, at long last, got a win under our belts - all be it in a friendly!